Post by Editor in Chief on Mar 5, 2008 21:29:37 GMT
Once again the Morporkian dogs have finished the farce they call an election, and new capitalist dogs have become the magistrates for the people they will soon abuse and repress. Most notably, that nation of liars and exploiters now has three thieves numbering among their seven magistrates.
This new low should come as no surprise to the civilised people of the Great City of Djelibeybi. Not only does Ankh-Morpork suffer thieves to live and keep their hands, it permits them to operate in broad daylight, in a large building in the centre of their filthy city! To add insult to injury, the Thieves are permitted to occupy a building that was once a courthouse. While we have long known that the Morporkian concept of justice is a joke for any but the wealthy repressers, this open disrespect for their own society shows how very far the Morporkian dogs have sunk into the depths of turpitude.
Our own council is, of course, in much better shape with only one prowler among its numbers. While Prowlers may technically be Thieves, it is widely recognised that they are no threat to anyone. Furthermore, our Prowler, Magistrate Ptoley, is safely outnumbered by members of more reputable guilds.
I took this information to the streets, to ingest the outrage of the People:
You say in Djelian: Greetings, Comrade Prophet.
You ask in Djelian: What do you think about the Morporkian dogs electing three thieves to their repressive council?
The grubby prophet gibbers madly.
The grubby prophet rants.
The grubby prophet giggles inanely.
The grubby prophet gibbers madly.
The grubby prophet twitches.
The grubby prophet gibbers madly.
You ask in Djelian: Yes, but is there anything you would like to say?
The grubby prophet rants.
The grubby prophet stares into space.
The grubby prophet gibbers madly.
The grubby prophet giggles inanely.
The grubby prophet froths at the mouth.
You say in Djelian: Um, I think I'll be going now. Thank you for your time, Comrade Prophet.
You ask in Djelian: Greetings, Comrade. What do you think about the results of the Morporkian election?
The unbalanced madman exclaims in Djelian: I believe my God will protect me!
You ask in Djelian: Greetings, Comrade. What is your opinion of the Morporkian elections?
The zealous priestess looks around sternly.
The zealous priestess exclaims in Djelian: I'll have you know, I don't tolerate any nonsense from foreigners!
Mr Tempus Plavalaguna emerges from a thaumic door which appears in midair.
The zealous priestess gleefully approaches Mr Tempus Plavalaguna.
Mr Tempus Plavalaguna eeks.
The zealous priestess exclaims in Djelian: Tempus! For twenty-six occurrences of "stealing and all-around general theft" you deserve to be abandoned in the wilderness!
A gaggle of priests and priestesses rush over to apprehend Mr Tempus Plavalaguna.
After grabbing him, they rush off towards the gates.
These reactions from our citizens show that while the Morporkian political developments have us frothing at the mouth, ranting, gibbering madly, giggling inanely, staring into space, and twitching, we believe the Gods will protect us all and we will not tolerate any similar happenings in our own lands!
This new low should come as no surprise to the civilised people of the Great City of Djelibeybi. Not only does Ankh-Morpork suffer thieves to live and keep their hands, it permits them to operate in broad daylight, in a large building in the centre of their filthy city! To add insult to injury, the Thieves are permitted to occupy a building that was once a courthouse. While we have long known that the Morporkian concept of justice is a joke for any but the wealthy repressers, this open disrespect for their own society shows how very far the Morporkian dogs have sunk into the depths of turpitude.
Our own council is, of course, in much better shape with only one prowler among its numbers. While Prowlers may technically be Thieves, it is widely recognised that they are no threat to anyone. Furthermore, our Prowler, Magistrate Ptoley, is safely outnumbered by members of more reputable guilds.
I took this information to the streets, to ingest the outrage of the People:
You say in Djelian: Greetings, Comrade Prophet.
You ask in Djelian: What do you think about the Morporkian dogs electing three thieves to their repressive council?
The grubby prophet gibbers madly.
The grubby prophet rants.
The grubby prophet giggles inanely.
The grubby prophet gibbers madly.
The grubby prophet twitches.
The grubby prophet gibbers madly.
You ask in Djelian: Yes, but is there anything you would like to say?
The grubby prophet rants.
The grubby prophet stares into space.
The grubby prophet gibbers madly.
The grubby prophet giggles inanely.
The grubby prophet froths at the mouth.
You say in Djelian: Um, I think I'll be going now. Thank you for your time, Comrade Prophet.
You ask in Djelian: Greetings, Comrade. What do you think about the results of the Morporkian election?
The unbalanced madman exclaims in Djelian: I believe my God will protect me!
You ask in Djelian: Greetings, Comrade. What is your opinion of the Morporkian elections?
The zealous priestess looks around sternly.
The zealous priestess exclaims in Djelian: I'll have you know, I don't tolerate any nonsense from foreigners!
Mr Tempus Plavalaguna emerges from a thaumic door which appears in midair.
The zealous priestess gleefully approaches Mr Tempus Plavalaguna.
Mr Tempus Plavalaguna eeks.
The zealous priestess exclaims in Djelian: Tempus! For twenty-six occurrences of "stealing and all-around general theft" you deserve to be abandoned in the wilderness!
A gaggle of priests and priestesses rush over to apprehend Mr Tempus Plavalaguna.
After grabbing him, they rush off towards the gates.
These reactions from our citizens show that while the Morporkian political developments have us frothing at the mouth, ranting, gibbering madly, giggling inanely, staring into space, and twitching, we believe the Gods will protect us all and we will not tolerate any similar happenings in our own lands!